I’m not sure how long it’s been since my team has been in first place. 10 years? With only two games left in the regular season, my team (Tony Romo’s Chastity Belt) has a one game lead over my dad (No Askident!), and the defending champ’s team (Team Parker). And yes, I’m secured a playoff spot. While I’m only 2 games ahead of Team Lopez and Dr. D Lover with 2 games to play, I’ve beat them both so if we were tied at the end of the regular season, I win the head to head tie breaker.
Here are the standings for as we roll into Week 12, which starts tonight with a game between Pittsburgh and Cincinnati.
Funk Division
1 Tony Romo’s… 7-4 W1
2 No Askident! 6-5 L2
3 Team Parker 6-5 W2
4 Dr. D. Lover 5-6 W2
5 Team Lopez 5-6 W4
6 The Dark Bull 3-8 L3
Moto Division
1 Speedo Boy 8-3 W3
2 Crank Dat LT 8-3 L1
3 Action Jacks… 7-4 W1
4 Unfortunatel… 4-7 L4
5 Hoth Funk Em… 4-7 L2
6 ENTER THE FUNK 3-8 L1
Speedo Boy and Team Lopez are the new teams this year, and I have to say, I’m impressed that they both have had the type of seasons that they are having. Speedo Boy has clinched a playoff spot and is vying for the number 1 seed in the Moto Division. And Team Lopez is right in the thick of things in the Funk Division.
It has been an interesting year as we moved over to ESPN’s Fantasy Football software after being on Statsworld for so long. I like it because it I have less work to do and also, it gives us everything we need and I don’t have to pay $70 for the service. Thanks ESPN. Also, in previous years, I was so involved in the organization of the league and the way waivers worked and stuff, I probably spent less time on my actual team than necessary and it showed big time. I haven’t had a solid season in years and now, I’m having a good year. My draft was pretty stellar but I’ve also been on top of the waivers and have made some choice pick ups.
Here are the top three match ups of the week.
Tony Romo’s Chastity Belt vs. Team Parker
This is a big game when it comes to seeding as well as credibility. Team Parker are the defending champs. My team is trying to win it for the first time in many, many years.
Team Lopez vs. No Askident!
Another divisional game that has playoff implications. Team Lopez is only one game behind No Askident! for the second playoff spot in the Funk Division. A win here would help solidify his spot for playoff glory.
Speedo Boy vs. Unfortunately Speedo’s Uncle
Unfortunately for Unfortunately, Randy’s young nephew has a better record than him. However, the reason this game is important is because it could be a sneak preview of the first round of the playoffs if things stayed as they are today. Can you imagine Randy’s nephew beating him in the playoffs in his first year in the league? I can’t imagine the Miles/Bartholomew household being a happy place for a few weeks. But then again, Randy would just take it out on him in Madden.
The words in the title were from the late great Owen Hart. I think it relates to this show.
We are now on to Episode 10 and I have to say, this show frustrates me dearly. I will do this one time and one time only. I’m going to give you three ways that they can make this show watchable and less frustrating.
1. Character development
This one should be easy right? Well, I have problems remembering some of the names of the characters. And I not only watch this show, but also blog about it. So if anyone should be able to remember character names, it’s me right? But it’s not easy. Why? Because there are certain characters who are given time to develop, aren’t quickly shooed away in 20 second scenes, and are actually likable or at least memorable. But there are others who aren’t. Kelly’s scruffy boy toy whose name I always forget (Ryan) is the single worst character on the show. He mumbles through his lines and is played for a douche bag time and time again. It’s pitiful. I also always forget Lori Loughlin’s character’s name so I simply call her Aunt Becky. And who even knows what the grandmother’s name is?
The characters need to be given time to develop. Rather than give us a potpourri of characters, write some stories where there are only a few of the gang and focus specific time in order to get some of them over. Why not do an episode where Adrianna and Navid are given a good amount of air time? We don’t have to see 20 different stories going on at once. Five would be fine.
2. Slow down and let things stick
I’ve used the analogy before of letting things stick to your ribs. It’s actually not that hard and you can look at the old show. They did this brilliantly. Whenever Brenda was upset (which was often), they held the camera on her face for a few seconds to let the emotion soak in. When Naomi is upset, she gets to give a dirty look for a half a second and they immediately cut away. It doesn’t soak in. When something important happens, you’re only given a few seconds to try to gauge the importance, and then it’s gone and it’s off to another scene. In the original show, they did everything so slowly. But that’s why it was memorable. It’s called story telling.
3. Slow down with the shock value
You can only go to the well so many times. And you can’t play a game of “top this” with your own show. There shouldn’t be catastrophic drama previewed for every episode. It can’t be a cliff hanger ever week. Why? Because it lessens the importance of the drama. It’s like crying wolf. The next time you try to promote something catastrophic happening, we won’t believe it because you’ve already lied to us a few times. Don’t promise the world in every episode. Because when you do have a great story line, it will mean that much more.
Ok, I’m done. I really wish the producers would read that, but I had to get it off my chest. Let’s get on with the horrible episode.
- My name is Sean, son of Harry Wilson and Tracy Clark.
- He has a terrible accent.
- By the way, the grandmother’s name is Tabitha.
- Naomi’s hot mom is trying to steal Harry from Aunt Becky. Won’t ever happen.
- Annie and Ethan are boyfriend/girlfriend officially.
- Ok, I think Adrianna is my favorite. I think it’s the fact that she didn’t model her physique after a stick figure. Baby girl has curves.
- Wait, they are all sophomores? Well, I guess if Annie just had her sweet sixteen. Brandon and Brenda were never sophomores. They were just juniors for a very long time.
- Brenda is back. And she’s pushing Kelly away.
- Uh oh, someone is pushing up on Dixon. She’s a cheerleader.
- They really need to stop showing these girls in their bras. I don’t need to see tons of collarbone and very little of anything else.
- Brenda told Kelly that she’s tired of fighting over Dylan and Ryan. Ryan? Kelly’s scruffy faced boy toy?
- Dixon is being a frustrated ball hog on the lacrosse field. And he just told his dad, “Screw you!” He’s just jealous because of the new brother.
- But Harry fixed it and made it all better.
- Brenda got in an accident and Kelly was called to the hospital. Brenda then told her that she slept with Ryan. Kelly picked up and went home.
- Can’t anyone be genuine on this show? Sean calls someone and we’re lead to believe that he’s scheming.
Ok, so the episode is over. It was a little more slower paced and they didn’t bring all the characters which meant the ones on the screen were given more time. That’s a plus. On the negative side, the acting was so stiff. There are so many things going on at once, yet they act the same in every scene. It’s quite odd.
The previews suggest that Brenda is pregnant (Ryan’s?), Dixon looks for his biological parents, Navid won’t sleep with Adrianna (fool), and Adrianna may slip with her drug issues. But it also said that was for January 6. Does that mean I get 6 weeks off from this show? If so, I’m very excited.
It’s been a long time, since I left you, without a strong rhyme to step to…
Ok, so I haven’t been keeping up with my Friday Night Lights. It’s ok. That’s what DVRs are for.
- Coach Taylor is now doing the QB shuffle and it’s hurting the team.
- JD gets the team a score and he replaces Saracen when it’s supposed to be Saracen’s turn.
- Saracen goes back in at the goal line to bootleg and run for the winning score, but it’s JD who sits atop shoulders. Don’t worry Matty. He’s going to get injured and you’re going back in my friend. I can smell it.
- Julie got a tattoo on her ankle and the rents are flipping out.
- Yay! Jason Street. And he’s a dad!
- Coach Taylor tells Saracen that he’s now QB2.
- Landry’s heart is broken and he’s listening to power 80s ballads. Poor Landry. And he just watched Tyra kiss the cowboy.
- Street, Tim, Billy, and Herc are trying to buy Buddy’s house and resell it. But Buddy won’t sell it to him.
- Saracen is mad and he’s throwing helmets. He wants to quit.
- Buddy says that he can’t sell the house to Street because he can’t sell it to Tim and Billy because Tim has his daughter.
- He just gave a great speech so that Buddy will sell him the house. “Don’t you remember when I was the quarterback?”
- Street’s baby mama is leaving and going East. After Street bought the house and everything.
- Matt has a heart to heart with his moms and he can’t quit the team.
This was a pretty boring episode. Nothing really happened. But the quality is still excellent. It was just on a treadmill this week.
For the next show, it looks like Cash, Tyra’s cowboy has a little baby mama of his own.
According to E! Online, there is a rumor that Brenda Walsh will be stricken with a serious health issue which could turn out fatal. The death of Brenda Walsh? I’m really not sure how to take that. But for some reason, my man Jason Priestley was interviewed for his guest stint on My Name Is Earl and this 90210 rumor came about. He played it off in a goofy way, but then was asked about his role with 90210.
Here’s what E! Online wrote.
Jason will be directing the 18th episode of 90210’s current season sometime after Christmas. He says he chose to work behind the camera, rather than reprising his role, because “There really wasn’t anything interesting for me to do as Brandon on that show. As the director who directed the most episodes of the original show, I just had more to offer as a director.”
Find him something interesting to do as Brandon! Writers get paid to write “interesting” stories. Come on!
Ok, let’s get on with the show.
- Naomi is obviously not over Ethan yet, and even worse, she sees her new friend making out with him after she pretty much agreed not to. Not a good day for the poor girl.
- Kelly is back and says that Dylan still has the same commitment issues.
- Not only is Naomi not over Ethan, and not only is her new friend making out with him, but her parents filed for divorce. Not a good day for the poor girl.
- Naomi just grabbed Annie’s phone to get the phone number of her old boyfriend Jason, who she left in Kansas. She’s not just sad, she’s getting even.
- I still think Adrianna is going to break Navid’s heart (it’s Navid, not Naveed).
- Adrianna wanted to get down with the freaky deaky with Navid, but he claimed that he had to work. He must be lesbian.
- Naomi is trying to sabotage Annie and Ethan.
- Jason just came out of Annie’s pool like the swamp thing. That Naomi. Sabotage.
- Navid’s father paid for Adrianna’s rehab and yet he’s open to his son dating this former drug addict.
- Finally! Navid’s mom just asked Adrianna about rehab. Though, she called her Amy Winehouse.
- Jason snuck a kiss from Annie. That Naomi. Sabotage.
- Oh by the way, I think this is supposed to be Annie’s 16th birthday party.
- Navid is the new Donna Martin! He just told Adrianna that he was a virgin.
- That Naomi just made out with Jason. Annie was hurt. Even though she’s been making out with Naomi’s ex. I don’t get it.
- Annie just told Naomi to meet her outside. Naomi did everything just to hurt Annie. Annie says she’s over being friends. And then their step brother showed up. Yep, the son that Harry and Naomi’s hot mom had together showed up to the party. What a fantastic ending to such a terrible episode. I was legit surprised.
Next week, Brenda is shown in the hospital telling Kelly that she hasn’t returned any of her calls because she slept with Kelly’s scruffy boy toy.
If I wasn’t so resilient I’d stop blogging this show because it’s so bad. But oh well. I punish myself.
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